A Few Thoughts About Change

Lillie took this encouraging photo of spring's arrival in Dennah's boat garden (before the recent snow storm~ugh!)

As the weather warms and the flowers begin to bloom, it is easy to see that a change of season is just on the horizon. Not all changes are as predictable or simplistic as the coming of spring. Recently, I read a post written by a friend as she reflected back on the way things used to be in their home. This got me to thinking about all the changes my family has made in recent years. Way back during what I often refer to as the "jumper season" of our lives, I really thought I had handle on things. The older I get, the less I feel I have a "handle on things."

Our goal has always been to raise children who love God with all their heart, mind and soul. This is the one thing that hasn't changed and never will. No other goal is more important to our hearts. But what about "the gray areas" of life? The areas that scripture addresses but are open to interpretation? Back when our oldest was much younger, it was easy to think for her, tell her what to wear and what to do. How the years have changed that! Each of my children are growing into independent people with their own thoughts and ideas. Surely someone must have told me when my children were babies that they would grow up to have their own opinions, but I guess wishful thinking must have caused me to overlook this detail about raising children.

We have spent years watching other families who we thought had it all together. Our objective was to learn from them with a hope to do good for our family. At times, I think we were more concerned about what others would say or thought best instead of what the Lord would have for our family. I think this is an easy thing to do in any situation...but not what God desires us to do. I am humbled as I look back on each time I took a friends advice over the thoughts and wishes of my husband. I am humbled that I was looking for a "formula" to produce children for the Lord instead of just spending more time walking with Him. I am humbled about having been more concerned with outward appearances instead of the condition of the heart. I am humbled that I ever thought myself worthy of giving advice or by boldly sharing my own opinion when what someone needed was God’s opinion. I am just so humbled...

Our family is crossing into new territory as our older children share their hearts and cause us to look at life outside the box of the "jumper years." I would have never thought we'd be where we are today but I wouldn't change it for anything. All things do work for God's glory...even when the paths of our lives take unexpected and sometime unpleasant turns. We originally thought our children would receive all their education at home. Susanna continues to live away and is attending public school. As much as this breaks my heart, it is easy to see that this is God’s best for both Susanna and our family. Hattie is now working on her LPN and hopes to begin a RN program in the fall. If God chooses to allow her to attend OBU, Hattie will be living on campus instead of at home. This is an area that we are truly walking in faith. Another walk of faith we are embarking upon is with Lillie. She now has a desire to attend public high school. We are asking ourselves many questions...Is this what God desires? Is this best for Lillie? Have we sowed the seeds of Christ enough into the heart our beautiful 17 year old daughter for her to stand strong and be a light? Is this a hill to die on or is our daughter's heart more important? Only time will tell as God opens and closes doors.

Then there is music, dress, courtship, hair, etc. We are choosing to re-evaluate things in the light of Christ and remember that these are "gray areas" and not "thou shall not." We are having to embrace the thought that if our children's ideas are not the same as ours, it doesn't mean we are dealing with rebellion. Just thoughts that are different. Many things are staying the same, only with renewed conviction that we are on the right track. Others are in the process of change.

One thing that is abundantly clear to me is that God only speaks to us about our family…no one else’s family. What is right for our family may not be God’s will for another. Just as what another family believes to be right (gray areas in mind) doesn’t mean that it is God’s will for our family. We are making changes. This is not to say that changes are being made because what we did previously was wrong, it was right for that season. Your family may or may not agree with the changes the Lord is putting before us. Our hope is that you will take comfort in knowing that we are seeking God’s will for OUR family and extend us grace. We are now in a different season…one we have never walked before. We are a work in progress. Prayerfully, we will look back to this season and know that we followed God’s will for our family, made Him first in our hearts and listened to the heart’s of our children…all for His glory.

“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.” 3 John 1:4